Mic Clickers: Easy 3-Point Guide.

And I’m not talking about the clicking of computer mice here. I’m talking about the highly vexatious and irritating habit of jamming people, mainly on 2m FM by others. Sometimes this escalates to music-playing and verbal abuse. They are here and here to stay. Thankfully there aren’t many of them, but we’ve nearly all heard one from time to time. What to do?

Don’t worry! I’ve compiled a quick, easy and memorable 3-point guide on what to do if you encounter any wireless abuse. Feel free to print this out and place it above your rig:

1. DO NOT acknowledge any interference
2. DO NOT acknowledge any interference
3. DO NOT acknowledge any interference

Clear enough? Self-evident? One would blooming think so. However, I’ve regularly heard some less-than-fully-brain-QRV amateurs :

1. Acknowledge the interference, repeatedly
2. Provide the abuser with a useful and accurate signal report
3. Articulate ‘entertaining’ anger and frustration to encourage further abuse

Once you can grasp the simple, blinding reality that these abusers only do this to elicit a response – provide them with that response and they will continue, satisfied and emboldened. Deny them that response and they will, eventually, cease and desist. I promise you.

In my beloved country of Wales, we have a legend that the entire army of Owain Glyndŵr, rebel leader and last (Welsh) Prince of Wales (1400 – 1415 AD) lies sleeping in a hidden cave in the mountains, waiting for the call to defend the country once more. I have heard amateurs say on-air ‘that a group of detecting stations’ was out-and-about and would quickly track down the offender with their accurate yagis and Jedi-like triangulation skills. Oh. Would this mythical radio foxhunting elite be the band of 2m septuagenarians who only exit their shacks to eat, make tea and perform vital bodily functions, would it?

Owain Glyndŵr,
detection genius.

It’s equally remarkable and disturbing how some people even enter into one-sided psychological games with their abusers, labouring under the misconception that they are cleverer than the offenders who must be naturally stupid. They are not. Threats of ‘I know who you are’ (when you don’t), reports to government agencies (who don’t care or are too busy), Owain Glyndŵr’s sleeping detection-army – I’ve heard it all. Don’t rely on the fact that you’ve passed a foundation exam that a five year-old girl passed last month will guarantee you intellectual superiority in this case. The same goes for intermediate and advanced licence holders for that matter.

Break any of my 3-point guide rules and you’ve lost before you’ve begun.

In my next blog: How to deal with pesky competition stations…….